Cob Jockey

On Monday, my Pilates instructor had me do exercises that only engaged one side of my body at a time, and during them she had to keep squaring my hips up for me - as in, she had to take my hips in her hands and move them for me.  I didn't have the self-awareness to know when they were out of level myself, but the left one was constantly lower than the right (as in, if you were facing me, my left hip would be closer to the ground than my right hip).  And it's not a leg length problem, it's a physical imbalance that has almost certainly developed over time.

Unrelated, hit a 200lb deadlift at 115lb bodyweight yesterday!  My first ever 200lb lift of any kind.  I don't normally do this but since it was a lifting workout and work scheduled a mandatory webinar during my noon class time, I watched it during class 😂  With the coach's permission!

All week since then, I've paid attention to that.  And  I've noticed I stand with the left hip lower than the right.  I've noticed that I run with the left one lower than the right (hello, possible cause of the left hip socket pain I get after I run more than a few miles?).  I noticed it in air squats, I noticed it sitting in my office chair.  I noticed it walking, which explains why my shoes wear totally differently.  I pointed it out to my husband, who told me to walk toward him, and he was like "Holy COW I've never noticed it before but there's a huge difference between your hips when you walk."

I also noticed it in the saddle.  And a lot of things started to make sense.

I know he's standing like a total goob here but LOOK AT MY HORSE'S ABS AND BUTT!!!  He's starting to look like a Quarter Horse.

Remember when JenJ pointed out my floating right hand in January and I filed that away for later because I didn't know what was causing that?  Turns out I only feel the need to do that when I'm tipped off to the left with my left hip lower than my right.  And what about my trainer telling me to lengthen my right side, dating back to, oh, years ago?  My saddle needing reflocked on the left side?  The feeling that I get in my seatbones, where my right one wants to glide along on a level plane, while my left one sort of rotates forward and down?  Our left bend struggles and trouble getting the left hind under his body?

Oh look, it me, sitting to the left with my right hand floating across the neck.  Bet I can find dozens of pictures just like this one (sorry, Griffy)

I put this to the test in a ride last night, although it was difficult and required a ton of concentration since I clearly don't have great proprioception for this.  But getting my hips level and my torso centered over him turned him into putty underneath me at moments when I'm used to a struggle.  It's not like it fixed everything, but a lot of things went from "straight up difficult" to "easier" immediately, and I could feel him relax, especially on the left rein, when I put my body "over the right side" (to my brain, which really meant straight and level).

Take me baaaaaaaaaaack.  Oh wait, just sent my deposit in for May!  I AM going back!

Based on what I know about mobility from CrossFit, I would guess that when I'm doing my bear down properly, my core tension doesn't allow my hips to go crooked, which is one reason Connor goes better at MW clinics and during GP trainer lessons, where we typically start with evaluating the bear down.

Lots and lots to unpack here, I'm really looking forward to tackling this imbalance and figuring out where else it has been causing me problems!

This week, I started Pilates.

Last week my barnmate was telling me about how she took up 1:1 Pilates lessons and how much it's helping her riding.  She was demonstrating one of the exercises to me, and said "And this is when the instructor poked my abs and said 'This side of your abs is a lot smaller than the other side!'"

Barn aisle Pilates, and an old man QH that has no idea WTF his owner is doing down there, haha

Oh, you mean like when Kate poked me in the stomach and said "You have no abs over here!"?  Yeah, I need that in my life!

Two things finally convinced me to sign up: first, finding out how crooked I had made Connor, and second, I was doing handstand pushups in CrossFit recently and became conscious of the fact that when my hands were even, my torso felt crooked, and when my hands were crooked, my torso felt straight.  Crooked is clearly normal to my brain, and it's going to take work outside the gym and saddle to fix it.  I signed up for three 50 minute personal sessions per week for 10 weeks, an amount which, according to a famous Joseph Pilates quote, should 'give me a whole new body'.  We'll see.

"But I like my body" - Hank

I've never been much of a Yoga person - it's a little too 'woo woo' for my brain.  I've always lumped Pilates in with Yoga mentally, although I'd never actually tried Pilates before.  But it wasn't anything like I expected it to be, in a good way.  This instructor does Reformer Pilates, aka Machine Pilates.

Not me, obvs, but this is a position I've found myself in a lot lately

Reformer Pilates uses spring resistance, cables and a sliding pad with shoulder stops to work your core/shoulders and give you awareness of your body.  I'm in the best shape of my life from a strength training perspective (two lifetime PRs in the last week, on power clean and front squat!) but I still find even the intro Pilates exercises challenging.  And it's making my abs sore.

It's really a great complement to CrossFit, in that machine Pilates doesn't give you a choice but to work muscles that you can find ways to work around in the gym.  Like the lower abs (hello MW).  And being in the shoulder pads on the Reformer, you can't be crooked while you do these.

There's other equipment too, like the chair, which I found devilishly difficult.  Especially when she told me to use my weak abs to move it and not my strong legs.

Looking forward to see what this does for me over the next 2.5 months!  Anyone else ever turned to Pilates to help them in the saddle?

When I rode the Haffies, Jen kept getting onto me about my right hand/forearm raising and coming to or across the neck, especially when I was turning left - something I'd never noticed before.  But, like anything else, once I realized it, I noticed I was doing it a lot. Next I had to figure out WHY I felt I had to do that.  I tucked that in my brain for later.

Right Arm, where u going?

Then I got my own Equicube, after trying JenJ's.  On Griffy, I found it hard but not impossible to keep him straight and steer while holding it.  Cube straight = horse straight.


On Connor, that concept went to hell in the most fascinating way.  With the cube dead straight, his neck was curved out from the base of the neck on the right rein (or in on the left rein), even though he was weighting the inside fore more, and I could not get him to go straight.

I didn't really know why until the vet looked at him for chiro and said, "His neck is an "S" shape if you look at it from the top.  The bulk of his muscles are on the left side of the neck near the poll, and in a knot at the base of his neck on the right side."


Well, s***.  That's my fault.  I'll cut through my diagnostic process and tell you what I've figured out:

- I have a hard time activating my left shoulder/sliding my left shoulder blade into the pocket at all times, not just in the saddle, which means that I'm constantly giving that left shoulder/left side of my body forward.

- Since I'm not plugged in with the left shoulder, my core isn't supporting me on the left

- Combine those things with an lack of self-awareness and the Equicube making me actually look at whether my reins are even or not, and you get...I think I've been riding with my reins for two different length for a while. And crooked feels even to me, because my torso is crooked.  Intentionally holding the reins the same length feels crooked to me.  My brain's whole perception of straight on the horse is wrong.



Connor's always been a tough ride to the left and had a real problem shortening his left side and engaging the left hind.  But now I've created a horse that's still a tough ride to the left AND has developed muscles that will make it even harder for him to do what he should be doing on that side.

And like anything else, I created it, and now I get the pleasure of solving the puzzle of how to un-create it.  Both the human and the horse.

Guess who started taking private Pilates lessons yesterday?

This is not Pilates ^