February 17, 2015

How to Blanket the Naked Pony for Subzero Temperatures

Step 1: 300g Rambo liner

His boredom behavior of choice clearly evident.


Step 2: Add 100g Rambo liner, because LAYERS PEOPLE. (Said in my best Sterling Archer voice)

Labeled, because as a former barnworker, I wish everyone did this.


The results of steps 1-2:



Step 3: Add Smartpak Ultimate Turnout Sheet:

Gross.

Inspect hardware closely:

He jingles when he walks.

Step 5: Add 100g insulated Horseware neck blanket, which has been modified to fit the Smartpak blanket:


I know it's ghetto, but it works.

Step 6: Admire your marshmallow.

"Who are you calling a marshmallow?"


Step 7: Turn out your marshmallow:



Step 8: Leave a note for the barn staff, because the liner system makes it hard for them to tell what he's wearing without taking the sheet off.  Write your blanketing intentions out clearly because it makes their lives easier when they don't have to sit there and wonder what you want done with him:



Step 9: Feed pony a treat and tell him to be good and stay warm:


25 comments:

  1. Oh man. Connor is so lucky. Pig is just wearing his medium high neck right now.

    I figure. He has hay. And the side of a barn. And he's only half naked. He won't die. I'll throw on his other 200g medium tonight. You know, the one he ripped all the way from the trim to the shoulder last week, when he felt it was too warm.

    Ugh. Ponies. This time of year Guinness gets so fed up with being blanketed he starts ripping everything off, no matter how cold.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Miles stays in his barn when it's this cold... so he only gets to wear his heavy weight. Plus, his clip is totally grown out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When it doesn't get too far above zero they stay in, but the barn is big and airy, plus the back wall to C's stall is actually a sliding door that doesn't seal at the sides, so I dress him as if he's outside. I know what you mean about the clip growing out, C is about halfway there.

      Delete
  3. Lol blanket musical horses is pretty much my life ATM

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Totally. Mine usually doesn't get too many changes this time of year, honestly.

      Delete
  4. love you blanket labels - what a good idea!!! i almost got ticked off this weekend when my mare was wearing the wrong blanket - but then i had to go through the whole barn checking blankets during my chores and realized what a pain it is to figure out what is what just by feel.... might recommend the labels to our BM haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are great! Even I can hardly tell the difference between my 100g and 200g liners. They were $5 apiece from haltertags.com.

      Delete
  5. As a barn worker, I always ALWAYS appreciate explicit blanketing instructions.

    I worked at a barn in Florida where people would roll their eyes and act shitty if people left out instructions, but that's because they were lazy. People paying board should have their horses treated as they want them to be treated. I'm okay with blanket-changing fees, though, because it does add significant time to the day (ASK ME HOW I KNOW AFTER MY 90 MINUTES OF BARN CHORES TAKING FIVE HOURS TODAY).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You want to hear about passive aggressive horse care instructions, I graduated from an equine studies department at a women's college! Haha. I always appreciated explicit instructions too, and am totally fine with blanket fees, though I don't get charged for them here even though I technically could be. I try to look ahead at the forecast and do my own, though with living 45 minutes away sometimes I get stuck and need them done. Blankets (and fly sheets) ate up so much of my barn working time.

      Delete
  6. Your Sterling Archer reference made me laugh! Weather like this makes me glad that I couldn't convince my horse to let us clip her. Sucks to ride, but it's nice in the frigid cold.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes! I knew someone would get it. Definitely - I couldn't live without clipping now though, with living so far away and taking lessons so late.

      Delete
  7. Archer is life. I want to be Pam when I grow up. I look like her, so that's at least 1/2 way there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amusingly, our sheriff's department head detective, a man in his late 60's, also loves Archer. They have nameplates in the empty offices that say things like "Sterling Archer Secret Agent" and "Dr. Krieger Applied Sciences". My favorite, though, is a printout in the conference room that says, "What do you think this is, the Sheriff's Department where you get to wear a windbreaker and go on a ridealong?!" - Lana Johns, ISIS Agent"...IN the Sheriff's Department! (Pretty sure they removed the ISIS part now though)

      Delete
  8. You're going to hate me for this, but my biggest problem right now is making sure Courage doesn't get overheated in the 50s-60s with sun we have during the day...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We're barely getting above 10 during the day right now. :-( No hatred, I'm glad it's warm somewhere on this planet! Hope for the future.

      Delete
  9. I think he gained 2 inches in height with all that poof!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I have the exact same tag in the exact same place on my Rambo liner! My pony is only wearing 300 grams, and a chest sleezy, and hating every minute of it but she only has a small portion clipped. I'm sure she can sympathize with your marshmallow pony.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely. It's rough. -13F with even colder windchills tomorrow night!

      Delete
  11. I am so jealous that the Rambo liners work for Connor! The front velcro on mine is attempting to tear completely out of the rest of the blanket and the body keeps coming up with mysterious tears even though I keep it religiously well covered... it makes me sad because I LOVE being able to layer when it's this cold.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I actually got that 300g liner for $30 because the velcro did exactly that, and it was brand new/unused. There is like a 8" tear with stuffing coming out around the straps. I fixed it with Gorilla Tape, which has held up all winter. I have seen the mysterious tears too, and also fixed them with Gorilla Tape! Strange how that happens.

      Delete
    2. I may need to get myself some Gorilla tape- thanks for the tip! I love liners but the manufacturers need to find themselves some better material. I have a Rambo liner and the closed front swishy blanket liners from Schneiders and they're both made out of the wimpiest fabric in the history of ever.

      Delete
  12. I am always jealous of your barn when you post pictures of it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! It's good that it is so beautiful, and I don't take it for granted, but it's also my only option here!

      Delete